Are you a giver or a taker in relationships? (Go ahead and decide your answer, I will wait....)
Got it? Great!
Now, for the next question. Which one SHOULD you be?
That was actually a trick question. Sorry to do that to you, but stay with me here.
The correct answer is: neither one.
You should be GIVING and TAKING. Think of it as a bank account. You put things in there on a regular basis, then you take things out when you need them. Because you are always adding to what's in the account, there will always be something in there and the account will never be empty. Relationships work on the same basic principle.
I know this is a very simplistic way of looking at it, but it sort of pares it all down and makes it very clear at the same time.
Every relationship should have a combination of give and take ON BOTH SIDES of the relationship. When one person does most of the giving and the other person does most of the taking, it is a recipe for disaster. This type of situation usually leads to resentment because one person is not getting their emotional needs met (and possibly other needs as well).
No person wants to feel unappreciated or taken advantage of, but that's what a constant giver feels like. (If you are a constant giver, then you know what I mean.)
We all become accustomed to behavior patterns that we establish in our relationships, whether they are healthy or not. (He always does this, so she always does that.)
In essence, you are both responsible for the way things work in your relationship. It doesn't matter if you are the dominate person or if your partner is the dominate one.
Let me give you a personal example. After our children were born, my life became wrapped up in the kids and our family life. It seemed like every minute of every day consisted of taking care of kids, cooking, cleaning, and doing laundry. As they got older I added chauffeur to my resume. It didn't help that during this time we were adding on to our house and remodeling two other homes. I felt so stretched that I literally couldn't function anymore.
But here's the thing. The kids didn't mean to take up my life. They didn't even realize they were doing it. When my husband put so many duties on me that were related to construction and remodeling, he didn't realize it was more than I could handle. He didn't realize so much was being taken from me. For my part, I continued to do more than I was capable of, and I didn't put my foot down. I allowed the situation to manifest and continue without change for a long time.
So here is how I finally handled my situation and got everything back in balance:
1) I talked to my husband about my issues and how I was feeling.
2) I set some boundaries on my time and energy.
3) I reevaluated things I was doing for the kids and decided some were not necessary and didn't really enhance their lives. I found better ways to use my time and energy to benefit them the most.
4) I started making sure that my husband and I got our date nights on a regular basis.
5) I established a monthly girls' night out with my friends.
6) I helped my husband understand that I needed some time alone to work without interruption (mostly on this site).
7) I stopped pushing things aside that were important to me.
Number 7 really sums up the whole thing. I remembered that I needed a life too. I was constantly putting things in (family life), but I was never taking anything out for myself.
Suddenly, it was clear what I needed to do. For example, I started shopping for myself again. And I understood that did not make me a bad mom. I started making plans to do things that I enjoyed (like before we had kids). And you know what? Our whole family is happier for it. I am a better wife and mother. And now my husband realizes how much he was taking and demanding of me. It was never his intention.
Now, let's look at you. It might be good to sit down and make a list of ways that you give and ways that you take. Maybe your partner could do this as well, then you can compare lists. You can learn amazing things about each other when you do this. Two people can live under the same roof but still not see things in the same light.
If You Are the Giver.....
It is imperative that you get a balance that is more equal because your relationship can only be healthy if you do. In my case I had an innocent husband and kids who didn't mean to take so much and suck me dry. However, there are situations where the other person is aware of what they are taking and do it on purpose because they can.
This is a more serious situation and is beyond the scope of this article. I would suggest counseling to help put things into perspective for both of you if you are in this situation. Many churches and employers offer this service for free
However, the majority of people will be able to establish a healthy balance by talking to their partner and setting boundaries as I did. Sit down with your partner and tell them exactly what you need to feel like your relationship is more balanced. "I need you to spend more time with me," is a good thing to point out, but it would be better to say,"I would like it if you could set aside every Wednesday night to spend with me." Don't be afraid to get specific about what you need. You will get better results if you offer up your expectations.
If You Are the Taker.......
If you take stock and find that you are the taker in your relationship, first understand it does not automatically make you a bad guy. This is just one part of your relationship and it can be changed at your will.
Also, you may have been playing off cues from your partner and not realizing that you were stepping over the line and tipping the balance of your relationship. Like I said before, we all get accustomed to familiar patterns in our relationships and repeat them without even thinking them through.
For example, if your partner says, "I don't mind fixing dinner," then you may agree to that every night. But they might now want to fix dinner every night and they may either do it because they think you won't (or they might be attempting to get an offer from you).
Being aware of the problem is half the solution. Now, the best course of action would be to sit down with your partner and ask them to list specific ways that you can "give" to their happiness and the relationship in general.
Remember, anything can be changed when you really want to change it.
For more information click here
Saturday, 25 February 2012
Thursday, 23 February 2012
WATCH THIS VIDEO AND IT WILL SHOW YOU HOW TO BURN OFF FAT BY EATING THE RIGHT FAT.....
WATCH VIDEO JUST CLICK BELOW.
Click Here!
WATCH VIDEO JUST CLICK BELOW.
Click Here!
THANKS TO THIS VIDEO I COULD BUY MYSELF A BRAND NEW HONDA ACCORD !!! IN JUST UNDER A MONTH.. CLICK BELOW AND WATCH....
Click Here!
Click Here!
Sell eBooks on eBay? You must Have an eBay Store.
I frequently get asked if owning an eBay store is worth the fees eBay charge. I personally think if you are serious about your eBay business owning an eBay store is a must and in this article I will try and explain why.
1. Owning an eBay store gives you your own unique URL to promote.
Having your own link to promote means you can promote your eBay store from your auctions, about me page, email signatures, forum signatures, blogs, articles, eBooks, newsletters etc etc.
2. You look more professional.
If you look like a professional seller you will sell more. Obviously a lot of factors count to looking professional such as excellent feedback but having an eBay store adds to the professional look. Also, a fully stocked eBay store gives you a professional look and with eBooks this is easily achieved at low cost.
3. You can sell multiple store items for a few cents per month.
That's right, you can list an eBook with a 1000 items available and this can cost only a few cents per month. You could actually list 1000 items in your eBay store and this would cost less than $30 per month. The minimum price to do this with 1000 auctions would be almost 10 times the expense.
4. You get to send out store newsletters.
Yes, you can build your own eBay subscriber database. Every time someone leaves feedback for you on eBay they get asked if they would like you to be added to their favourite sellers list. If they accept they can also subscribe to your store newsletter. This means you can send out mailings to your past customers. Plus you can also set up eBay to send out regular mailings on your behalf every 2 weeks.
There is also the option to add a link to your store newsletter and store favourites in all your auctions. This is a crucial promotion tool eBay provides, just look at the top right corner of any of my listings to see these links in action. This means you can add people to your eBay mailing list even if they don't initially buy from you.
5. You can 'feature' your most profitable items.
By putting your most popular items in the featured section of your eBay store you are gaining maximum exposure for the items that make you the most money.
6. You can personalise your eBay store to differ yourself from other eBay users.
With a little HTML experience you can add categories, logo's, graphics, pictures and a lot more to give your eBay store a more personalised, professional look. Even if you are not familiar with HTML you can still create an attractive looking eBay store.
7. You can track traffic and sales.
Depending on your store subscription level you can track a whole host of features such as store traffic, your most viewed items, search terms used in your store, where your visitors came from and a lot lot more.
8. You can link to your store from all your auctions.
If you use all the tools eBay provides you can have up to 10 links to your eBay store from every auction you run. Without an eBay store you can have 3 or 4 links at the most linking to your other items.
9. Your store and store items will appear in the major search engines.
Google 'planetsms' and you will see number one is my website and number 2 is my eBay store. You can add keywords to your eBay store and there is also more chance of your listings showing on google. In fact if you search Google for the term 'planetsms eBook collection' or even just 'eBook collection' you will see both search terms are on the 1st page of Google :-)
10. You get to say 'visit my eBay store'.
Sounds silly doesn't it? Well get more visitors to your eBay store and you will sell more and that's a fact no one can deny. You can ask people to visit your store in your auctions, about me page, email signatures, forum signatures, blogs, articles, eBooks, newsletters :-) etc etc etc.
There you go, 10 reasons why you should have an eBay store. I have probably missed out a lot more and maybe even some more important reasons why you should have an eBay store but I'm sure you get the picture.
------
John Thornhill trades on eBay under the username planetsms and earns over $1000 per week on eBay on autopilot. To see how he does it visit his eBay store at http://stores.ebay.com/PlanetSMS
1. Owning an eBay store gives you your own unique URL to promote.
Having your own link to promote means you can promote your eBay store from your auctions, about me page, email signatures, forum signatures, blogs, articles, eBooks, newsletters etc etc.
2. You look more professional.
If you look like a professional seller you will sell more. Obviously a lot of factors count to looking professional such as excellent feedback but having an eBay store adds to the professional look. Also, a fully stocked eBay store gives you a professional look and with eBooks this is easily achieved at low cost.
3. You can sell multiple store items for a few cents per month.
That's right, you can list an eBook with a 1000 items available and this can cost only a few cents per month. You could actually list 1000 items in your eBay store and this would cost less than $30 per month. The minimum price to do this with 1000 auctions would be almost 10 times the expense.
4. You get to send out store newsletters.
Yes, you can build your own eBay subscriber database. Every time someone leaves feedback for you on eBay they get asked if they would like you to be added to their favourite sellers list. If they accept they can also subscribe to your store newsletter. This means you can send out mailings to your past customers. Plus you can also set up eBay to send out regular mailings on your behalf every 2 weeks.
There is also the option to add a link to your store newsletter and store favourites in all your auctions. This is a crucial promotion tool eBay provides, just look at the top right corner of any of my listings to see these links in action. This means you can add people to your eBay mailing list even if they don't initially buy from you.
5. You can 'feature' your most profitable items.
By putting your most popular items in the featured section of your eBay store you are gaining maximum exposure for the items that make you the most money.
6. You can personalise your eBay store to differ yourself from other eBay users.
With a little HTML experience you can add categories, logo's, graphics, pictures and a lot more to give your eBay store a more personalised, professional look. Even if you are not familiar with HTML you can still create an attractive looking eBay store.
7. You can track traffic and sales.
Depending on your store subscription level you can track a whole host of features such as store traffic, your most viewed items, search terms used in your store, where your visitors came from and a lot lot more.
8. You can link to your store from all your auctions.
If you use all the tools eBay provides you can have up to 10 links to your eBay store from every auction you run. Without an eBay store you can have 3 or 4 links at the most linking to your other items.
9. Your store and store items will appear in the major search engines.
Google 'planetsms' and you will see number one is my website and number 2 is my eBay store. You can add keywords to your eBay store and there is also more chance of your listings showing on google. In fact if you search Google for the term 'planetsms eBook collection' or even just 'eBook collection' you will see both search terms are on the 1st page of Google :-)
10. You get to say 'visit my eBay store'.
Sounds silly doesn't it? Well get more visitors to your eBay store and you will sell more and that's a fact no one can deny. You can ask people to visit your store in your auctions, about me page, email signatures, forum signatures, blogs, articles, eBooks, newsletters :-) etc etc etc.
There you go, 10 reasons why you should have an eBay store. I have probably missed out a lot more and maybe even some more important reasons why you should have an eBay store but I'm sure you get the picture.
------
John Thornhill trades on eBay under the username planetsms and earns over $1000 per week on eBay on autopilot. To see how he does it visit his eBay store at http://stores.ebay.com/PlanetSMS
Wednesday, 22 February 2012
10 Top Compound Exercises to Blast Fat and Build Lean Muscle
Years ago I found myself weighing 250 pounds, constantly squeezing rolls of fat on my stomach, and just all around unhappy with myself in the mirror. Personally, I know what it feels like to suck your stomach in and wonder what it would be like to be shredded. Now, my job as a fat loss and fitness expert allows me to use my empathy and knowledge to train numerous clients and help them achieve unbelievable success in reaching their target body in my boot camps. It takes a lot of work and a lot of training. It has been proven again and again, the best training program for fat loss and lean muscle gain activates as many muscle groups of the total body in the shortest amount of time. While interval training is hands down the best protocol to use during an exercise session to build muscle and lose fat, compound movements efficiently provide total body workouts and give you an amazing boom for your buck in a single exercise.
Compound movements or combination lifts combine two or more movements performed uninterrupted and in succession into one exercise. For example, take two familiar exercises. The squat, which is notorious for its fat blasting and lean muscle packing effects. Now throw in an overhead press and the squat/press compound includes even more of your total body and becomes downright merciless. Simply put, compound movements explosively burn fat and build lean muscle because they activate more muscle in a shorter amount of time. Prioritize your personal workouts with compound movements like these instead of single joint exercises to supposedly "isolate a muscle" and your good to go. Remember this Power Body Reaction:
↑Muscles Involved�"(↑Calories Burnt + ↑Muscle-Building Stimulus )�"↑Fat Lost + ↑Muscle Gain
Confession time. I have a love-hate relationship with exercises like this. Love because of the ridiculous results they provide for fat loss, muscle building, and conditioning. Hate because they turn on that voice in my head saying, "Do you really need to do this?" and wondering whether I'm laying in a pool of sweat or tears every time.
By now your saying "Get on with it. I'm sold. What are these crazy exercises I need to be doing right now!?" Let's lift veil of suspense. Here is my official top 10 list of favorite exercises in the world for fat loss and lean muscle gain (in no particular order):
Exercise 1 - Power Clean + Thruster Combo - Kettlebells, Dumbbells, Bands, or Sandbags
Exercise 2 - The Swing - Kettlebells, Dumbbells, Med Balls, or Sandbags
Exercise 3 - Alternating Lunge + Curl to Press
Exercise 4 - Mountain Climber Push-ups - Valslide or Bodyweight
Exercise 5 - Woodchopper - Dumbbells, Kettlebells, Med Balls, Bands, or Sandbags
Exercise 6 - Kettlebell or Dumbbell Snatches
Exercise 7 - Turkish Get-Up + One-Arm Dumbbell Chest Press
Exercise 8 - Burpee with Overhead Press
Exercise 9 - Med Ball Snatch-Slam Combo
Exercise 10 - Single-Leg RDL + Row - Kettlebell or Dumbbell
Use my advice jack up your training by introducing these 10 powerful compound exercises we use in my boot camps to work the total body. You are guaranteed better results in less time by consistently employing these movements into your workouts. Of course it's ultimately up to you to do what it takes to take your training and your body to the next level!
------
Lou Kristopher, CSCS, RKC is a Walnut Creek personal trainer and body transformation expert who helps his many clients discover their best shape ever by burning pounds of unwanted body fat and gaining muscle using cutting edge training techniques. Qualify for a free 1-week trial at Power Body Boot Camps by visiting www.totalpowerfitness.com.
Compound movements or combination lifts combine two or more movements performed uninterrupted and in succession into one exercise. For example, take two familiar exercises. The squat, which is notorious for its fat blasting and lean muscle packing effects. Now throw in an overhead press and the squat/press compound includes even more of your total body and becomes downright merciless. Simply put, compound movements explosively burn fat and build lean muscle because they activate more muscle in a shorter amount of time. Prioritize your personal workouts with compound movements like these instead of single joint exercises to supposedly "isolate a muscle" and your good to go. Remember this Power Body Reaction:
↑Muscles Involved�"(↑Calories Burnt + ↑Muscle-Building Stimulus )�"↑Fat Lost + ↑Muscle Gain
Confession time. I have a love-hate relationship with exercises like this. Love because of the ridiculous results they provide for fat loss, muscle building, and conditioning. Hate because they turn on that voice in my head saying, "Do you really need to do this?" and wondering whether I'm laying in a pool of sweat or tears every time.
By now your saying "Get on with it. I'm sold. What are these crazy exercises I need to be doing right now!?" Let's lift veil of suspense. Here is my official top 10 list of favorite exercises in the world for fat loss and lean muscle gain (in no particular order):
Exercise 1 - Power Clean + Thruster Combo - Kettlebells, Dumbbells, Bands, or Sandbags
Exercise 2 - The Swing - Kettlebells, Dumbbells, Med Balls, or Sandbags
Exercise 3 - Alternating Lunge + Curl to Press
Exercise 4 - Mountain Climber Push-ups - Valslide or Bodyweight
Exercise 5 - Woodchopper - Dumbbells, Kettlebells, Med Balls, Bands, or Sandbags
Exercise 6 - Kettlebell or Dumbbell Snatches
Exercise 7 - Turkish Get-Up + One-Arm Dumbbell Chest Press
Exercise 8 - Burpee with Overhead Press
Exercise 9 - Med Ball Snatch-Slam Combo
Exercise 10 - Single-Leg RDL + Row - Kettlebell or Dumbbell
Use my advice jack up your training by introducing these 10 powerful compound exercises we use in my boot camps to work the total body. You are guaranteed better results in less time by consistently employing these movements into your workouts. Of course it's ultimately up to you to do what it takes to take your training and your body to the next level!
------
Lou Kristopher, CSCS, RKC is a Walnut Creek personal trainer and body transformation expert who helps his many clients discover their best shape ever by burning pounds of unwanted body fat and gaining muscle using cutting edge training techniques. Qualify for a free 1-week trial at Power Body Boot Camps by visiting www.totalpowerfitness.com.
FOR THE BEST ABS CLICK THE LINK BELOW
AND WATCH THE VIDEO... FOR MEN AND WOMEN
ENJOY!!!
5 Odd Foods that KILLYour Abdominal Fat?
See some odd fat-fighters...
Click Here!
Tuesday, 21 February 2012
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)